cardboard piano

My grandma plays the piano beautifully. When she was little, her parents didn’t have enough money to afford a piano, so she drew a full size keyboard on a piece of cardboard and that’s how she learned-- on drawn black and white keys. She spent hours with her cardboard piano memorizing the notes and chords.

I heard that story for the first time this weekend and kind of loved it.

This is her as a teenager... with a real piano.

All in all I had a pretty amazing time in Houston visiting friends and family for the holiday and did not one but THREE shoots while I was home.

First up was my gorgeous little sister.

Then, I did a shoot with my beautiful cousin, Robyn. I only get to see her a couple times a year, so it was SO great to spend time with her!

And last but not least, my dearest friend Nicole, her husband Matt and their dog, Piper. Nicole and I have been friends since elementary school. She is basically family.

perry

This is Perry. He’s a friend from Arizona who now lives in Pasadena. I tend to laugh a lot when I’m around him, and our photo shoot was no different. Thanks for letting me take pictures of you, Perry!

breathing

This week I worked on a piece for a student show at Fuller that’s coming up in December. I’m pretty close to completing it, but will wait to post a picture. This is the blank panel board, though. It’s big.

When I start a new piece I have this wonderful feeling of terror that comes over me where I think, “Maybe this is going to be awful. Maybe this will be so bad that I won’t even be able to finish it.” My first stroke on the canvas I literally envision as jumping off a cliff.

I really have those thoughts.

Maybe that’s normal?

After I got going on this one and things were coming together, I had a couple of ideas that seized me where I felt like, “YES! let’s do that!” I went thrift store scavenging and found so many amazing materials.

But then I found myself battling more fear thoughts. Those thoughts went something like, “Maybe you should just save that idea because what if you never have a good idea like that again?? Maybe you shouldn’t really go for it and just keep that one for later.” And as small as those fear-thoughts are, they're something that I have to recognize and refuse.

I remember years and years ago coming to a place of conviction about not being afraid to let “good” ideas be realized. It seems kind of backwards, but there really is something scary about giving an idea you’re excited about a chance to be.

A few weeks ago when I did Sarah’s photo shoot, Sarah was talking about exhaling being an act of trust because you're releasing every bit of oxygen you have, and you would literally die if your body didn’t kick in and inhale again. All day long we go about doing our thing while our bodies calmly act out this profound picture of trust.

So all of that to say, I think creating is a little like exhaling. In every act of creation there is an act of trust in letting it go..in giving it out. We let those ideas have a place in the world and trust that more will come….

Today I am going to do a shoot with a guy. It’s my first man photo shoot. I’m excited.

portraits: andi, april & sarah

My friend Andi, who I love and adore, was willing to model for my first ever portrait shoot. It was so much fun.. like I was surprised how much fun I had taking these and was pretty pleased with how they turned out. I feel like they captured (or at least alluded to) the earthiness and beauty that is Andi.





My goal is to do a shoot a week. Last week I did a shoot with Sarah...



And today I did another shoot with my dear friend April. Here are some of my favorites...

ritual/liturgy

So I took a photo lab through the Brehm Center taught by the lovely Shannon Leith, and one of our assignments was to pick an object that was part of the ritual (or liturgy) of our week and photograph it daily, observing it in different lights and attempting to engage with it in ways we hadn’t before. A little weird, but I chose the toilet paper roll in my bathroom. I think I wanted to pick something that was completely mundane/unattractive/dismissible and really give myself to the process of discovering it. Here are some of the images from that exploration…

sorting it out

So I’ve been feeling conflicted for some time about what to do with this blog. Do I just use it to post information about VintageRemade happenings?? That felt kinda boring to me…. BUT was I ready to make this space personal and use it as a real journal of sorts? Eeek.. wasn’t really sure.
I’ve been having some adventures with photography and collage making here recently and thought that it would be fun to be able to share and talk about those things too. AND I live in this amazing city where there are incredible things that happen in the way of art, music, film, etc.. that often leave me undone with their brilliance. (and sometimes make me regret spending the money, but usually that’s not the case…) SO.. I have come to a decision. I’m going to make this space be an outlet for more than just sewing stuff. It is settled.